my baby is off to the land of home. Her father is taking her on their annual trip to his and mine home state to spend time with his family. She loves these trips and I begrudge her that fact, now meaning to. I just hate her enthusiasm and miss her so much and could live without the run-down of all the crap he is doing.
I am not a cunt. I want her to have fun and I want her to be able to tell me she is having fun but I really feel kicked in the gut when she has to tell me each and every dollar he spends on her reducing their relationship to a financial deal, making him look like a bigger ass and making me feel like a poverty stricken failure to make her smile. Is it wrong that I took a little joy in the fact that while he sent her out with her new "step mommy" to shop for the trip that she lost the brand-new cell phone he gave her? Ironically she spent less that a total of ten days with him this past calendar year and he feels the need to give her a cell, but she cannot take it home-my rules. I don't think it is a necessary piece of equipment for her considering it is a source of problems with school and driving and paying attention as far as teens are concerned. Because of our genetics, she hasn't a need to call as she is with me at mostly all times or at a family member's house where they have a phone. She is well looked after. But he got her phone, knowing she would never be allowed to bring it home so long as she lives under my roof (yes, I do check her things as per my right!) so he wasted his money on just wasting it for the mere fact of he could and knows I cannot. (Yay, Dad of the YEAR!)
Add to the fact he denies she has a disability and refuses to tell or explain it to his family and they have all booked her visit with all sorts of "no-no's" to which are difficult to a child of fifteen to say no to on their own. Children rely on the adults in their lives to be the heavy and the "Jiminy Crickets" and get short-changed when we try to do otherwise. His denial means he is refusing to provide a safe environment for her and he is more concerned over his good time than making accommodations. His family, if they were told at all, I am sure do not even know what she has so they can do the research themselves. In a metaphorical sense he is allowing a blind child to walk alone on railroad tracks and crippling her capability to help herself. So I will be depressed, angry and unhappy until she comes home safe and sound. I will worry until I die that he has caused irreparable damage and I will be wary when she is a little older as to whether she can handle her restrictions on her own.
It has been brought to my attention it will be her choice to choose to live as she should having a long and happy life as she makes it or chooses to be foolish and making her life painful and short. It sucks that we can sacrifice so much and love so completely and not be allowed to have a say in that! So, if you're in the greater Springfield Massachusetts area and see a guy who resembles a cross between Prince and Sonny Bono with a full-figured short blonde white beautiful eyes but only a tender age of fifteen, tell her I love her and miss her and will be here miserable until she gets home and punch him in the face...just make sure you tell him it was his parents' fault for not providing him with the safety he needed to avoid that disaster!~mobe's love to her all and her all to her loves.
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