Needs

Needs suck! We all have them and have had them for centuries to millennium. I need right now to know where the original copy of this particular post disappeared to in cyberspace! Seriously, I had it finished and >poof< it is gone and this site wants me to show it my scars so it will know it is me at my computer as if my vernacular was common practice these days! Anyhoo, let's see if I can do this again...

Ever since the beginning of time we have been a social society with needs leading us like lemmings to the White Cliffs of Dover. Don't get me wrong I have my own fair share and who doesn't want to feel needed? It has it's perks but I have learned to love the lack of needs being thrust upon me without consent or invite. Lobo needs me less and less each day and has no problem telling me so. She is at the point where if I don't feed her she won't starve and can take better care of herself than most men/women I have resided with! No more diapers and booboo knees. She doesn't even tell me when she is hurt or injured until well long afterwards. And despite what she'll say, I do get a little satisfaction out of the fact that she still needs me to cheer her on and such, less hands on and more head in. Head in the oven of the stove, while she shreds my ears day in day out with her incessant need to inform me of every issue and friend and song she knows I won't approve of and fart she puts to paper as if my own smell isn't bad enough in print! I feel like sticking my head in the range and hanging a sign on my fat ass that reads "Ding Dong the Witch is Dead: Now Get Your Own Damn Dinner!" But I will settle for the blank stare I can pull off without a twitch. Good god she folds her arms and pushes her one foot forward as if to tell me to STFU with her needy little OMGs and WTFs and what nots.

Don't get me wrong. I have met some needy shits in this day and she isn't too bad. I'm not even without needs of my own as the only one I truly will have unfulfilled by the time I'm dead is the need to be HEARD and understood.(that's where you all come in for those that didn't catch it) It was me listening to the adults growing up and never daring to open my mouth for fear I'd miss something important, and now my own kid holds me hostage to listening to her fourteen year old drivel. Since when did my right to speak just get tossed out with the dirty water?(throws hand to forehead as if the over-dramatic gesticulation will incur the "sucking in between the teeth" pity response from you the audience) I need a break and while we're at it I need a car and a home and a smaller ass and my kid to wear a muzzle and a man who thinks the sun sets on my fat ass and the moon riseth on my breast. Be kind and throw in my grandma's blueberry dumplings too with a scoop of Breyer's French Vanilla ice cream and everone to get the hell out for a bit while I make love to the bowl and spoon! Seriously! Beware the Needful things, my lovelies, for they will steal your souls and banish them to the kingdom of fire and brimstone! Mua-hahahahaha-hah!!~mobe's love to her all and her all to her loves(if ya find a sexy "mr. not gonna do her wrong" walking around anywheres send him my way *wink)