Good Enough

there is no place where i can go to think about my fate
i chastise even moment's pause while wait for life to abate
but in the depth of narrow mind there's course for cause to find
a head so full of madness leaks of certain vile kind

somehow it seems it just got in to places it ought not be
and tore its way from globe to globe to pulverize the me
so left here crying without a tear or salty sea water trace
this madness takes its claws so deep puts creases on my face

i am weary now and i am tired here for all the work not done
and try as may can without a single arm lift for it seems too much for one
sedately and serenely i visualize what others do and say
while sitting and ranting in my own wasted way's day

i thought it would be grand to show off some skill
in the crafts that i chose of my own free will
'gainst the wishes of family and warnings of friends
who never mind the good things from crafting i send

and write me a letter to remind just how
much of a goof up i've been all along now
in motivation's humiliation is a somber truth
that the idle hands are the devil's tool and may become one's own noose

even in my own quiet vacation away from the fight and the war
i still keep my skill sharpened and ready for use writing out lore
and then i think alone to myself it is mad but ingenious as hell
insecurity's question echoes next i wonder if this is how great writers foretell

a goal it will be but not one for just me though the fear takes its bite
i think i am good enough as it is but still hold back from sharing my write
maybe tomorrow i will when vacation does end
when the fall is upon us and the children our send

maybe then i will believe i am good enough all
to be up on a poster with a picture in the hall
and send some blasted work rather than sit on my egg
maybe then i'll get up off of lazy ass and lazy leg

but for now i just smile and pull down shaded cover for sleep
with velvet dreams in corduroy lakes my slumber is deep
and when i awake it's a new night a new day for my breed
maybe then i will be good enough, good enough, indeed

~mobe's love to her all and her all to her loves