remembering the past should be a library to aide you in your future endeavors, but it doesn't always work that way. It is a shame really, because I hated history yet learned so much about how human nature is flawed and why they are that way and choose to remain that way.
It was important to teach your young to feed, cook, sew and heal themselves. They learned how to raise their children by watching a working family unit making tough choices and moving forward, if even they take a few steps back sometimes. Only now children don't want to do chores or learn to cook or care for themselves. Even the most of poverty stricken youths feels entitled as if the world owes them some thing. I had to sit for hours watching grandmas and mom crochet. It wasn't an important task...like learning to play the piano it was an art. It was a dying art but has proved useful in repairing objects and such that one has that are either handmade or crocheted by machine.The same is said for sewing and what not. Kids feel they can just throw shit away and get new because we taught them that. What gets me is when two parents don't teach the same program the kid will almost always choose the easiest short cutting method, and this is where I am at with Lobo and it is worse for her if she chooses NOT to learn the basic necessary skills in life. Our life is certainly different than 99.9% of you.
If she doesn't learn to prepare her own meals and what is safe and what is not, then she WILL starve. We require different foods than most of you and you cannot walk into a restaurant and order what we eat, certainly not at a reasonable price and most restaurants don't prepare OUR food. Other skills such as hygiene tips that others take for granted and cleaning skills are important too, but if she doesn't learn to clean she can always trash a shithole she lives in like her father and leave letting the next bloke fix/clean it until she runs out of landlords to rent to her. People need to learn to listen to their bodies and have the skills needed to take care of them.
Sure, you can go to a doctor and trust a complete stranger to treat you like cattle and humiliate you and judge you and disgrace you and refuse to treat you, but what do you do when that happens? How can you tell a stomache virus from food poisoning when they look the same way? How do you treat them when the treatment is almost the same but not quite? Why don't people know how to take care of themselves? There are tribal peoples inhabiting this earth still considered uncivilized where the children contribute and there is peace and harmony within the tribe and the people of the tribe live to be ancient in years and survive things the common "learned" man cannot. They do this because no one shows up with a washing machine and sells them ice in the middle of winter out of it!
There's a reason we have old wives' tales and things we pass on, but if the only thing you pass on is fighting and depression and hate mongering and short-cutting guess what you've taught your little mini-you? I cannot help the war I have with her father and some of you cannot stop the wars you have with your significant others but we can say the most simplest of words to our children and enforce it: NO. No you cannot go outside if your room is not clean; no you cannot have ice cream if you didn't eat your dinner-or my favorite, if you told me you're full. If you're full then you are too full for that candy bar you have hidden in your book-bag that you think I am too stupid to see! No you cannot go to your girlfriend's birthday party if you just disrespected me or used foul language-I will be damned if I allow you to display that behavior in public. No, you cannot stay out past curfew, and no, mom and dad-curfew is not midnight for a high schooler that has to get up at six in the morning let alone a three year old or middle schooler!
We have to put a firm foot down and not be afraid to parent our kids. I am not afraid of cracking my beloved in the lip when some foul word comes out her mouth. I want her to use proper language when she is unhappy and learn how to cope and communicate in a manner befitting a person who is empathetic to all of society and not just a selfish twit who will spew out any diarrhea that comes out! I have grabbed her lip and pinched for dear life so the next few hours she has the throbbing to remember that what comes out is just as painful to my ears as what she feels right then. It is never enough to tell them once. YOU didn't learn all of your job on the first day first try! Hell, you didn't learn to tie your shoes on the first try. So, yes, you HAVE to keep reminding them and keep giving them consequences and if they keep refusing to step up to the plate you shove the little fucker into the real world.
Lobo wants motivation. Today she got some. Today she is a woman who is in charge completely of her life and future. No longer will she be clothed, fed, provided for, healed, ministered or comforted unless she "buys" these things with her hard earned elbow grease. If she doesn't do her chores or learn her skills then she will be another "culling of the herd" and it is and will be most unfortunate for her. Will it hurt me? My feelings maybe, but I assure you I won't starve-because I DID my job and taught her right from wrong, and she can choose wrong but she is choosing to make her life more difficult and for her, it will be worse than your son(s) and daughter(s) because she isn't even human! She is the only person who will be able to teach her children our culture because there are so few of us and the people that wrote our history and our books were human and filled those books with lies and myths and I am trying in my meager capabilities to rewrite them for her and future progeny, with what little time I have left. I expect her to persevere and to take her future and her possible offspring's futures to heart and buck up and do the right thing. I would expect it even if I WAS human.
As for those of you with children that scream and holler and call you all sorts of names, I am just the Mary Fucking Poppins that you need. Nanny McPhee be damned, I will learn them some skills and teach them some tough love. Give them motivation. Make them "earn" their own way and live by their own choices. If they don't want to do the work or the learning and they threaten to throw you under the metaphorical bus of justice and the "laws" of man (however warped), then let them be carried off to a foster family or juvenile hall and see if they find that a more suitable environment to call an adult a "whore" and a "cunt" and other colorful language! YOU were NOT put here to be their best friend. You were put here to TEACH and GUIDE them, if even by the scruff of their insolent little necks! Your job is to INFLUENCE their decision making process, to teach them that you are flawed but NOT to allow them to follow in THOSE particular footsteps. Sure you feel guilty if you drink and feel like a hypocrite telling them not to. Tell me about that when they are locked up in jail from running over a five year old in a drunken rage because you didn't want to say NO to them! Tell me how guilty you feel for your mistakes and waste more valuable time away from teaching and guiding. Let your failures be a foundation for "what not to do" and not what they can get away with. NO child should ever call a mother or father anything other than the formal or informal version of "mommy" and "daddy," EVER! No chilod should ever hold a parent hostage to its rage and its will because it doesn't get what it wants. It is already fucking up your day so "UP" the ante and grab, snatch, yank that little shit out of the shopping cart and drag it to the car and buckle them in and drive them home and discipline them and give them consequences. Do the shopping later and make them "pay" you back for the time and gas wasted by washing the car, doing laundry or writing sentences to instill good morals in their minds over and over and over and over again. I am so sick of slack parenting and slacker kids. I fight everyday to undo the slacker shit she comes home with from her father's house. He isn't even there to TEACH her anything or supervise her! He picks her up and drops her off on neighbor(s)' and relative(s)' and what not while he keeps acting like a fuck up!
Wake up peoples! This is serious shit. Look around at your brother's kids and your sister's kids and your neighbor's kids and tell me what you see. Think about how your own children behave and where they learned it, if not from you condoning everything either out of guilt or just pure lazy parenting. Think about who your children associate with and what type of person you want them to be. Are they on track? Will they get there with the skills you gave them or are they seriously undermanned for life? ~mobe's love to her all and her all to her loves.
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